So, how many New Year’s resolutions have you broken?

Come on. It’s Day three. and already you have had too much to drink, too much to eat, or too much to smoke.

Some of you even managed to do all three at the same time.

You skipped the jog, had a third cup of coffee, and yelled at the kids.

Is this the way you want to start off the New Year? Failing on the first new thing you’re trying to accomplish?

Maybe it’s because we inhale too many noisemakers. Or we think we’re full of invincibility, having survived the stress of the holiday season.

We believe that fulfilling everyone’s wish list gives us carte blanche to reach for the stars when the rest of the year we struggle to change a light bulb.

Truth is, this isn’t the time for great expectations, but low probability.

We’re physically, economically, and socially drained.

We crossed hundreds of mall miles and main streets, bruised elbows, shoulders, and whatever else along the way for the chance to pay 22 percent interest for the next three years on the latest electronic gadget.

I can’t understand why folks like to share their resolutions. If you want to change something in your life that you’re not especially proud of or fond of doing, wouldn’t you want to keep that thing to yourself?

How about writing down what you’re cutting back on or what you’re giving up? Keep it in a notebook for yourself. It could be your special secret.

But secrets are no fun unless they can be shared.

I believe New Year’s resolutions were started by some procrastinators looking for another excuse to delay making a decision.

A University of Washington study not long ago found that 67 percent of people make three or more resolutions.

I suppose they’re just covering their bases with backups.

And surprise, nearly 40 percent of folks say they’ll exercise more. Yeah.

You’re not going to exercise.

That stationary cycle is now your most expensive hanger.

The only sweat you’ll break is when you try to open gifts that have been hermetically sealed in enough plastic that they can never be touched by human hands.

My advice is not to overreach.

Why set yourself up to fail?

Today’s resolution should be to get out of bed before it’s time to go to bed.

Don’t swear off food. Just cut back on the biggie-size fries.

Don’t worry about asking for a raise. First, make sure you have a job.

Take a vow of celibacy after you’ve exhausted all possible dates in the coming year. Don’t set yourself up for failure.

And if you’re not going to keep a resolution that will help yourself, why not try some that will help others?

Folks will appreciate you vowing never to do the chicken dance in public.

Or vowing to make a right-hand turn after you put on your right blinker. Or better yet, keep your blinker off if you don’t plan to make a turn in the next five miles.

How about promising not to yell into your cell phone “Can you hear me?” when at the movies.

Or have some idea what kind of doughnuts you want before you reach the drive-up speaker. The choices are pretty consistent.

These resolutions will make us all feel better.

What makes resolutions credible is that we forget about them. Once the eggnog-champagne hangover ends, we have a hard enough time remembering what year it is, let alone caring what someone promised in between chords of “Auld Lang Syne.”

Happy New Year.

Barry Lewis is a longtime journalist and author who lives with his wife Bonnie in the Town of Neversink. He can be reached at      barrylewisscdemocrat@gmail.com.