Growing up, most of us learn that the keys to doing well and advancing in a job are working hard and keeping your nose clean. 

It’s true ... mostly. 

Here’s what they forgot to tell us: The real stars are the ones who excel at memorizing acronyms and abbreviations.

Corporations tend to keep track of KPIs (key performance indicators) and OKRs (objectives and key results) while their marketing departments are busy generating MQLs (marketing qualified leads) and keeping down their CPC (cost per click). 

At the same time, the IT (information technology) department is hard at work keeping the LAN (Iocal area network) secure and connected but has just enough time to pester you about setting up the 2FA (two factor authorization) on your devices. 

If your head has already begun to spin, you may want to sit down. 

I’m just getting started. 

The data team wants to talk about the LTV (lifetime value) of a customer and those MRR (monthly recurring revenue) trends, while everyone over in finance has their heads down to finish that P&L (profit and loss) statement and calculate the business EBITDA (earnings before interest, taxes, depreciation and amortization) for the big presentation. Gotta make sure the business is getting their ROI (return on investment), after all.  

Pretty soon you’ll get an email from HR (human resources) to let you know all about the C&B (compensation and benefits) at your new job, and whether or not they offer an FSA (flexible spending account) or ESOs (employee stock options). Don’t put things off — ignore that email and you may have to wait until the next OR (open enrollment) to sign on to the company health insurance plan. 

Check your calendar, and you might have an invite from a PM (project manager) to the meeting where you’re all going to complete a SWOT (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats) analysis. In a week the same group will meet to walk through the RACI (responsible, accountable, consulted, informed) chart.

TBH (to be honest), I’ve GTG (got to go). There’s a new SaaS (software as a service) product I should probably be checking out. Word has it they’ve got everything you need to succeed at an SMB (small to medium sized business).